May This Be A Good One

A May post. I had an urge to write but didn’t have much time to compile everything into a good writing. Ugh, never mind. I’ll write what I want to.

Surprise and more surprise in this month. I even didn’t expect but God is always good. Right. No question mark.

A little thing unrelated to God (or bit deviant?), I always check my horoscope in the beginning of the week on one of the astrology account on twitter. It’s @poetsastrologers, in case you want to try your luck. But man, it feels so accurate and sometimes motivates me. Last month, they told me all about “You’ve been doing it and still no results but don’t stop. Keep going. You get there.” And this month is all about “You get what you need.” And stuff. And it’s surprisingly coming true. I shouldn’t rely onto this thing, but I will keep what is good and throw what is bad. You know, sometimes, what doesn’t make sense could make us keep going and motivate us. In a ridiculous way, yeah, but it does (it did).

I didn’t talk much about my college life to everyone because it’s one of the sensitive parts you shouldn’t touch. I was trying my luck (driven by astrology) and now I’m here, kinda step out a little. Still long way to go, I must say… but a small step has meaning, of course.

Do not underestimate ever little thing we take! That’s what I keep in my mind, so I will not feel small in front of everyone.

This issue has been shadowing me like forever. People’s achievements sometimes worries me; this makes me comparing myself to them; leads me to overthinking that I’m small, useless, pathetic, and not capable of doing things. One word: negativity. Don’t let that word take our mind. Seems easy? Nah, I often wake up at 3 am just to cry and regret everything. It takes time learn how to adjust the situation and calm the nerves. Our mind can eat ourselves. That is why we should believe that we are different; we have our own timeline; we have our own journey. They may get a thing today, but maybe we will get it tomorrow, or the next day after tomorrow, or next year. No one knows, but only thing that I’m sure: we will.

Sounds cliche? Uh well, this is how I work on my own anxiety. It doesn’t mean 100% I’m healed. But at least, it makes me feeling better. So maybe, it will work for you too who does feel the same. What we are doing has meaning, even it is small until we can’t see… it is happening.

I wonder why I always have this kind of talk in every post I write. It feels like I’m talking to myself. Well, who knows.

By the way, loosen up a bit!

Arctic Monkeys has finally released a new album. You don’t know how happy I am getting a new music. This is what I’ve been waiting all this time. I listen to it on Spotify, enjoy one by one. The title is Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino. Yes, I know. They sound different. Honestly, something that I didn’t guess. I expected more drums and more beats, and more loud. And all we got is a swinging, slow, and more pianos. But oddly, I still enjoy it. I feel like I’m having love-hate relationship with this new album. I love it but I hate it. I love they sound more like Alex in Submarine’s soundtrack and also the lyrics but I hate the fact they reduce the drums and the whole album sounds like just the same. If I compare to the old ones, I feel disappointed but when I leave it alone, I’m in love and enjoying too much. Well, so glad that we finally got a new one!

And another exciting part is: they still play many old song live. Okay then… I’m okay. There was this crowd in Berlin that went crazy and whoah, that is all I need!

(sorry, i 100% forget where i found these pics, if i found the source, id edit it)

Ah, I finally watched movie alone at cinema. Been on my bucket list since 2 years ago and yeah finally. I watched Avenger: Infinity War. It was a mixed-up feeling. If I could, I would definitely scratch that purple face of Thanos for messing up with my kid, Peter Parker. Gosh! Dear Marvel, leave him alone. Do not do anything stupid!

Anyway, the feeling of watching movie alone is fun. Now, I don’t need to worry if my friends aren’t going. You just focus with the movie, nothing else. Ultimate me-time, it is.

I got a chance to see Reality Club live! It was like… FINALLY! Definitely one of my favorite performances. Such an amazing experience. I love the energy. I sang along with all of my heart, stamped my right foot following the rhythm sometimes hoped, and even screamed. Yeah, I was that happy. Fathia danced like there’s no tomorrow. All good. All fun. All fine.

(i took these, i know im a shitty photographer but man i aint got time to focus on that i was busy singing n dancing)

Well, I’m home now. Enjoying the more slow motion. Also, it’s Ramadan, meaning a fasting month. Wish us a blessed one.

and, wish me luck on my thesis. HA.

I got a lot to tell. Like a lot. But my fingers don’t wanna type and my brain don’t wanna think. Didn’t know why, but I kinda want want to post this. So, yeah.

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